


Across the Shore May You Find Peace

by camping_trash_44



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/F, Happy Ending, Major Character Injury, but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-30 14:12:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14498763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camping_trash_44/pseuds/camping_trash_44
Summary: Anya gets sent on a dangerous mission by The Commander and Raven is not happy about it. For obvious reasons.Angst and Ranya fluff ensue.





	Across the Shore May You Find Peace

**Author's Note:**

> A little one shot that just came out of my fingers when I sat down to write. A bit of a 'feels' Ranya one-shot. A bit of a story to tide over everyone waiting for the last chapter of my multi-fic. 
> 
> Regardless, enjoy!
> 
> P.S. This idea has probably most definitely been done before, but come on, one more couldn't hurt right?

“Please don’t go.”

“Hodness, I have no choice in the matter. Heda herself has asked for my hand in the matter.”

Raven, from her spot on the fur laden bed, watched the grounder’s general gather various weapons stored around her room. The candles lit from their strategic placement casting a soft glow inside, Raven thought that the candlelight made her lover’s tanned skin glow. She sighed as Anya laid her favorite dagger on the table next to a small hand drawn map and water canteen. 

Anya was set to leave with a small troop of one tracker and another warrior well before the sun would touch the horizon. The Commander had ordered Anya to travel into Azgeda territory to find one of Nia’s most deadly assassins, a woman who so far has left a bloody trail through Polis. The killer needed to be stopped at all costs and Anya was the only person Lexa seemed to trust with the task. Raven knew that if anyone would be able to track and finally silence the Azgeda assassin it would indeed be Anya. 

That fact did not mean that Raven had to be happy about it though.

“Screw Lexa, this is a suicide mission. There has to be another way, Anya.”

At that the grounder whirled around so quickly Raven barely saw the movement before Anya was across the room and a foot from the bed she was on. “Don’t ever speak of the Heda that way, Raven.”

Seeing the hard set tension of the woman’s jaw Raven held her hands up in surrender, noticing too the softness that crossed Anya’s eyes in the moment. Reaching forward Anya took one of Raven’s hands and held it gently while smoothing over the rough callouses gained from years working with tools, “I am sorry hodness, you do not deserve to be talked to in such a manor.”

“No, I over stepped. I’m just…I’m just scared, Anya.” 

At the admission Raven felt herself build back up her walls quickly, despite how much she loved Anya and trusted the woman, Raven found herself still battling the scars she received since the day she touched the ground. 

“There is no need to be frightened, I have been on many missions like this before. I hold no fear in my heart.”

“Fine. Have no fear, rush off into danger and get yourself killed.”

Despite herself, tears pricked at the back of Raven’s eyes as her own words started to form visions of a dead Anya strewn across a funeral pyre as the fire ate away at her body.

Seeing her lover’s unshed tears Anya finally relented, shucking off her boots and then laying in her bed…their bed she secretly hoped for one day. Raven did not hesitate to bury herself in Anya’s arms as the woman gathered the furs around them, the safety of Anya and her quarters creating a bubble of weakness in her. 

“You are correct, Raven. If I have no fear, there is always a possibility for a fool’s error in battle or for my eye to overlook a detail. Now though…I do have something to fear.”

A scoff left Raven’s mouth, “What does the Commander’s right hand have to fear?”

“Losing you in this lifetime.”

“There’s always the next…Grounders believe in a type of reincarnation.”

“Yes, hodness, but that does not mean you would not mourn in this life before the next. That thought will keep my mind sharp and my body alert. My loyalty belongs to Heda, but my body and heart belong to you. My one fear is to leave you.”

Raven let the words her lover spoke settle in her chest as she reveled in the safety of the moment before it was ripped from them. Slowly she accepted the truth of their situation…no matter what, Anya would always choose her duty to her people and to Lexa first. Coming back alive was the prize for her actions. 

Sighing her acceptance, the brunette stretched slightly to press a soft kiss to the underside of Anya’s jaw.

“Hold me until you leave.”

“Sha, hodness.”

***

Raven was in her make shift workshop, much smaller than the one she had in Arkadia, tinkering on a simple yet effective communications system to replace the long range radios currently in use. Her mind wandered to the last night in Anya’s arms causing her hand to slip and a small electric shock to course through her body. Throwing the small tool across the room and yelping loudly, Raven sprang up from her chair and huffed out into the open air.

She needed to clear her mind. 

It had been nearly a week since Anya had left in the middle of the night, since Raven had heard the woman’s voice…nearly a week since Raven had slept peacefully. 

Raven walked through the crisp earth air breathing deeply, she would never tire of fresh air after a lifetime of recycled air on the Ark; she could pick out the scents of several different stalls in the open market surrounding Polis Tower. She passed the stall of the man who made the best swords and daggers in Trikru, Anya’s personal favorite as well. At the stall occupied by an elderly woman Raven stopped and bought her favorite snack, perfectly seasoned rabbit wrapped in course bread. At the stall covered inch by inch in leather worked clothing and cloth, Raven turned her head and walked faster, her hand unconsciously reaching for the leather band Anya had crafted for her, ‘a commitment to each other’ she had called it. 

A bitter feeling coursed through Raven’s chest at the sight of a young couple holding hands as they walked through the market, the young man was clearly a warrior in training with thin scars lining his arms and one on his face, the woman looked soft and unmarked from years of a less hardened trade. Their love was etched into every action and every fiber of themselves. Raven was a private and rather closed off person, years of struggle on the Ark then the constant danger of the ground causing her to be as such, but she couldn’t help the feeling of resentment of not being able to claim Anya publicly. 

Like Lexa belonging only to her people, causing her and Clarke’s relationship to be held secret until the blonde was more respected for her title of Skikru Ambassador, Anya belonged to her people in the same way. Anya could not be seen with a lover, with a clear distraction, weakness in a tangible form. Raven’s stomach turned at the thought of hiding herself away. Yet she understood the reasoning too, her and Clarke accepted the long and rocky road of loving a Grounder in power, arguably two of the most powerful at that… Lexa clearly as The Commander and Anya for being her former mentor and current top General. 

Her thoughts were interrupted by the loud crackle of her radio coming to life, Clarke’s voice cutting through the noise of the market, “Raven, come in, Raven.”

“Raven here, over.”

“Come to the war room now.”

The blonde’s voice was concrete and concise, but Raven practically ran at hearing the clear worried undertone of the words too. Her heart beat rapidly in her chest and Raven cursed the brace on her leg for not letting her go faster, she hastily pushed people out of the way making her way to where Clarke told her. By the time she reached the closed doors and the two posted fierce guards there was thin sheen sweat across her forehead and arms. With a scorching look, one she adopted from Anya, the guards opened the door for her. 

The sight that welcomed Raven almost stopped her in her tracks, if she had not seen the horrors that came with life on the ground she would have been sick right in the war room. Lexa and Clarke were standing side by side, their faces masked of any type of emotion except for Clarke’s worried glance at Raven when she entered. A warrior was laying on the table, a healer stitching up a large gash along their leg. 

Then Raven’s eyes fell on the body displayed on the floor, limbs arranged in an awkward angle and blood soaking through their clothing. For an instant Raven’s whole body shut down in dread at the thought that it was Anya’s lifeless body on the cold floor. 

Slowly and all at once Raven focused on the now blood red furs and the marred scar ridden face of the body, clearly the Azgeda assassin that had been the goal of the mission. Relief flooded through her body at seeing that corpse was not Anya. She smiled at the thought, then she remembered Clarke’s worried glance when she walked in and the distinct lack of the other warriors dispatched on the mission. 

Looking to Clarke she fought the bile that threatened to crawl up her throat, “Where is Anya?”

Before Clarke could start to answer, Lexa stepped forward and walked towards Raven, she could just barely make out the small signs of sadness hidden in green eyes. 

“Raven, Anya fought fiercely, like a true Trikru warrior. Though, even the best fall…em gonplie ste oden.” Lexa’s voice was barely a whisper, holding herself together in front of her warrior and healer in the room. 

So many emotions overtook Raven’s body at once she felt completely numb. 

Anya was dead. 

Then the Commander’s words ran through her head again and she finally settled on one emotion and let it burn through her body setting her blood on fire. 

Straightening her spine and eyeing Lexa evenly, she spit at the Commander without thought that it could very likely get herself killed, though now she didn’t care, “That’s all she was to you, a warrior, a pawn to be sent to die! How dare you Lexa. She was only yours to command and crush under your boot.”

“Raven stop-” Clarke’s voice barely cut through the blood rushing in her ears as the anger spurred her on.

“I love her! She’s dead because you sent her on that suicide mission! Damnit, I loved her. She was supposed to come back to me…but you killed her.” 

Slowly the anger faded to grief and the adrenaline left her body as reality set in, Raven stumbled and sank to her knees. She wanted to scream and cry but all her body felt was dark emptiness. 

Raven felt two hands tentatively reach out for her own, her skin crawled at the thought of being touched by anyone except Anya, causing her to violently throw herself away from whoever it was. Scrabbling away on her hands and knees across the cold floor, ignoring the small cuts forming on her hands Raven shook her head and noted the nausea storming in her belly. She felt her back hit a wall and Raven let herself slump gracelessly against the barrier, too tired to fight already. 

Eventually she heard more than felt someone crouch near her, making sure not to touch any part of her. A soft whisper reached her ears, “Come Raven, there’s a room in the tower I’ve had set up for you…you need to rest.”

Raven’s mind reeled at the thought of sleeping alone, no warm body pressed against her or dirty blonde hair caught in her mouth. 

“No, take me to her room.” A pause between them as Clarke hesitated, “please.” 

At Raven’s broken plea and an unseen nod from Lexa, Clarke agreed and lifted Raven from the ground. Once she was upright, Raven finally looked into the eyes of the two people who delivered the worst news of another lover dead; she felt her heart harden at the pity that was clearly etched there. All at once Raven gathered herself and steeled her spine. 

No, Raven Reyes would never again be on the receiving end of anyone’s pity. 

Taking one deep breath she took solid steps towards the door and eventually down the hall to where she knew Anya’s room was. She was glad to hear the silence following her indicating that Clarke hadn’t followed her, choosing to stay with Lexa and give Raven her space. 

She needed to be alone because as soon as she crossed the threshold of Anya’s room and closed the door she finally let sobs rack her body  
.   
***

Raven did not leave Anya’s room for five days straight. 

She didn’t deserve it after yelling at Lexa, but she was sure that the Commander made sure meals were delivered daily and a bath was drawn twice during her personal exile by a silent worker scurrying to avoid Raven. She ignored the meals, the food turned to dust the moment it touched her tongue anyway, she ignored the first bath drawn for her but did let her stiff muscles soak in the warmth provided by the second bath. Raven didn’t even wait for the woman to leave the wash room before she stripped and slid slowly into the large copper tub. 

Raven only slept due to exhaustion and the lingering scent of Anya clinging to the furs of the woman’s bed. 

On the second day of her exile Raven scoured the room she already knew so well. She stared blankly at every sparse detail of the room. The well placed candles. Two sets of swords mounted to the wall, Raven knew they were not for decoration but for ready use at a moment’s notice. She found the few trinkets the warrior had allowed herself to collect. A small wooden toy horse crudely carved. A torn patch of leather from something unknown to Raven. The piece of parchment clearly ripped from a small sketch book that held the portrait of a much younger Lexa and Anya from long ago. Raven’s heart clenched painfully as her eyes landed on the twisted piece of metal that she forged for Anya, the symbol of her people. 

Raven felt as if she could easily never leave the room again, honestly. If she could no longer have Anya in life, she could have her in the small moments and in the safety of her former lover’s space. 

Today though, was the Ambassador’s meeting called to order by Lexa and the only reason she was willing to leave from her self-imposed exiled to Anya’s quarters. She was not an Ambassador, that was Clarke’s position, but Raven was needed for her electrical and engineering expertise...well, and her penchant for making things go ‘boom’. Lexa and the Council were starting to plan a full scale attack on Azgeda. Raven was the only one capable of utilizing Mt. Weather and possibly weaponizing the stronghold if it was absolutely necessary. 

So, Raven bathed and dressed herself in her own clothes though she tucked one of Anya’s daggers in her boot before she left the safety of the room. 

Raven entered the war room silently and found a spot along-side a few other Skaikru members that were permitted to join. She ignored the idle chatter that filled the air as they all waited for the Ambassadors’ and The Commander’s arrival. Her eyes fixed themselves to the floor where not even a week ago the tattered and bloodied body of the Azgeda assassin occupied. 

Pain pierced her chest as she realized that the body she saw with her own eyes was likely the one responsible for taking Anya’s life. 

Her thoughts were interrupted by the Council walking through the doors, she let Clarke’s gaze find her own and the blonde could be seen sighing in relief. Raven bowed her head along with the rest once Lexa walked into the room clad in her heavy coat, blood red sash, and signature war paint along her face. 

From that point on her attention was only half held by the negotiations of the inhabitants of the room. Only once was she asked a question, Lexa herself turned expectantly but it was Bellamy’s shove to her arm that caught her attention. Her voice came out cracked and harsh after not being used for five days, after coughing once and receiving an understanding nod from the Commander, Raven proceeded to explain her possible plans involving the hidden weapons in Mt. Weather. 

Before she could finish her speech about rerouting the acid fog the doors to the war room crashed open and thin man rushed into the room, his head thrown down and covered in sweat. He kneeled before his Heda waiting to be received; a wave of Lexa’s hand brought the man forward to whisper in her ear. 

No emotions crossed the impenetrable mask of the Commander at the words. 

Another wave of her hand sent the man scurrying out of the war room faster than he came in. After a pregnant pause, curiosity filling the air, Lexa abruptly stood from her chair. The rest of the room stood as well.  
“This meeting will be continued tomorrow. Leave.”

Everyone in the room dared not disobey their leader and rushed out of the space, before they could all leave though Lexa’s voice rang out once again.

“Clarke. Raven. Stay.” 

Raven halted immediately, both from surprise and tiredness. Whatever the reason Lexa needed her was most likely important, therefore tiresome for Raven…she just wanted to once again curl up in the furs with Anya’s fading scent. 

Once the room was completely empty Lexa turned to address the two women, “Clarke, your mother has requested my presence in the infirmary. I believe you and Raven should accompany me.”

With that Lexa simply turned on her heel and walked towards the doors. Raven and Clarke shared a confused look as they followed the Commander out of the room. 

The walk to the infirmary was silent save for the echoing footsteps of the trio and the soft rustlings of the daily activities of those who worked in Polis tower. Raven wondered what could possibly be so important that Abby Griffin, not a normal healer, would be in the Polis infirmary and requesting Lexa to oversee. Much less what would entail Raven joining. 

Raven’s mind raced as she started to piece together the puzzle, sensing dread upon their arrival. Lexa was rarely requested, much less during an important meeting, and then to actually postpone said meeting in favor of whatever secret as yet to unfold. Then to have Raven tag along, something bad had to have happened for this level of urgency mixed with her own area of expertise. 

As they reached the infirmary, Lexa stopped abruptly and turned to face Raven and Clarke, looking at the blonde first letting her mask falter slightly at her love only to replace it once again when she leveled Raven with a powerful look.

“Anya was never a pawn or a simple warrior. Nor will she ever be.”

Before Raven could fully process what The Commander said, Lexa pushed the doors open with a sweeping hand to indicate for Raven to enter. Confused and cautious Raven stepped through the doors into the one room in the tower with harsh electric lighting, squinting her eyes at the sudden change she stumbled a bit.

Once her eyes adjusted to the new brightness she recognized the woman across the room as Abby, taking in the soft sound of the familiar voice as it wafted through the air. Momentarily Raven was confused as to who she was talking to, then she noticed that the Doctor that had saved her own life was currently crouched over a body laying prone on a medical bed. Abby finally looked up from her patient and made eye contact with Raven sending her a small smile as well. 

As Abby stood up straight her patient came into clear view, it took Raven a moment to follow the pointed look the elder Griffin was giving her, eyes glancing between her and the patient. 

Raven’s stomach dropped when she finally saw who was lying on the bed.

A broken scratchy voice barely reached Raven’s ears, “Apparently, I am too stubborn to die.”

If asked later, Clarke swore Raven literally flew across the room to be at Anya’s side in an instant. The brunette crumpled along-side the bed and laid her forehead to rest gently against Anya’s. The grounder reached up with one hand to wrap her fingers around Raven’s neck to hold her in place. 

“I’ll kill you myself if that’s the case.” Raven whispered, letting lose a small laugh against Anya’s lips.

“Raven, I’m sorry, but there are still some wounds to suture before she loses more blood.”

Reluctantly, Raven released her lover but her eyes never left the woman as if she looked away for a moment the woman would disappear and Raven would wake up from a cruel dream. She watched with wide worried eyes as Abby resumed her work of sewing Anya’s skin back together. There were several small lines already tended to across her thighs and arms, easily seen as Anya was only in her under wrappings that were coated in blood and grime. Raven though was occupied with the long and relatively deep slice along Anya’s chest and stomach, starting at the base of her neck and trailing down almost to her navel, it was yellow and green in some places like a small infection had set in over the past few days. 

“Nou get yu daun, Reivon. I will live.”

“I get to worry, Anya. You’ve been dead for days now, only to show up alive and with a massive very life threatening wound”

Lexa stepped forward from where her and Clarke were observing, “Raven is right, this is an…interesting occurrence. Tell your story.”

Anya coughed slightly, causing Abby to send her a piercing glare at the disturbance, before she answered, “We were in Azgeda territory looking for the assassin…she found us first, using the open terrain to her advantage. The snow was nearly blinding too. It was a moment of weakness that we paid dearly for. Aton was dead before his body hit the ground, an arrow in his throat. Erik and I barely missed the next few arrows, one pierced my thigh-”

Abby interrupted with a mumbled, “Barely missed her artery too.” 

“The next movement and she was upon us, slashing like an animal. I could barely see but blood started to color the snow. Then I felt the blade on my chest, the other world was calling, but I saw Erik tackle the Azgeda scum so I pulled my dagger and ended her fight while we had the chance. He tried to wrap my chest so I could make the journey home…we only barely made it to our borders before exhaustion and infection found me. Erik fought me, but I ordered him to carry on, I was dead and would get him killed in the forest too.”

“A selfless decision.” Lexa nodded her support for her former mentor’s actions.

“A stupid decision.” Raven mumbled, she knew that the Commander would only allow so much disrespect now that Anya was back.

“Yes, regardless your view, I lay in the grass ready for my peace when nomads found me. Their markings suggested from the boat people but by this time I was barely able to breathe. I felt them working slowly, rubbing some sort of salve and rewrapping my chest. The pain causing me to sleep deeply. When I woke, I was propped up against a trading post just outside Polis, the young woman there gave me water for the journey home.”

“That’s when I found her.” Abby punctuated her sentence by a final snip of scissors once the last stitch was knotted. “She was half alive stumbling into the city center, I barely got her into the transport vehicle before she passed out. Damn lucky I was on my way to visit you, Clarke.”

Raven finally let her gaze detach from Anya to catch the eye of the Doctor she owed so much to. “Thank you, Abby.”

With a nod and warm smile Abby announced, “Alright, Dr.’s orders, our General needs a lot of water and even more rest. She should be cleared in a day or two…when I decide, General.”

Lexa extended her hand to settle on Anya’s shoulder and give a gentle squeeze, thousands of words and emotions passed between them without effort. The Commander then reached for Clarke’s hand to lead them out of the infirmary, Abby cleaned the stationed around them before leaving Raven and Anya finally alone. 

Raven, for the first time in her life, was left speechless. There were too many words for the emotions she was feelings. 

Anya was alive.

“You kept me moving forward.”

“No, sheer luck, your stubbornness, and the kindness of strangers kept you alive Anya.”

For being known as a fierce and ruthless warrior, Anya surprisingly quickly adopted a very convincing guilty face. The woman reached forward and slowly knit her long fingers with Raven’s, the later noticed that Anya’s knuckles were bruised and swollen. 

“The stars you come from knew that you and I had more time together, that is all.”

“Don’t drag grounder lore and culture into this. Look, I know that you’re impossibly loyal to Trikru and Lexa above all else, but…but fuck, Anya, I don’t even know what to be mad about.”

“Hodness, there is nothing to be upset about, I am home, alive and well soon to have you back in my arms.”

“What about the next time Lexa decides to send you on a dangerous mission, or there’s an attack on Polis, or…or…what if a mutant wolf eats you on a hunt?!” Raven sputtered, standing quickly and pacing the length of Anya’s bed. 

“Raven.”

“You’ll just rush off into the darkness in the dead of the night or try to spear a mutant beast.”

“Raven.”

“Because that’s what you do, be a badass sexy warrior. Punch first, ask later!”

“Raven.”

“What Anya?!”

“Sit, please.” The grounder motioned to the chair with a curt not of her head, Raven sighed as she sat heavily in the chair. 

“There will always be a next time, ah no let me speak please. There will always be a next time, you are correct. Not only am I loyal to The Commander, a part of myself lives for the impossible tasks and training until my bones are weary and my skin is bruised and broken, those are all parts of myself.” 

Anya let out a rattled sigh wincing slightly at the pain from her stitches pulling. “But these past few days made me realize something I seemed to already know…I just needed to almost die first. I feared losing you, but now what I fear more than anything else, is leaving you. Being apart from you permanently in any way, actually. I fought every minute to make it back to Polis, back to you. I’ll never stop being Anya kom Trikru and my life with it…but I will be better, safer. I had nothing to live for before so I was ready to always lay my life down for Heda, but now I know…you are the only reason to end my fight for.”

Instead of answering, honestly Raven was tired of talking, she gingerly climbed into the bed Anya was laying in, curling into the warrior’s chest careful not to disturb the wound. Anya wrapped her free arm around her lover and hugged her closely to press a kiss to the top of her head. 

“Little Bird, why do you smell differently?”

“…I did not leave your room for five days straight, so…”

“Once I am healthy, we can spend five more nights together in my bed.”

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry not sorry for all that angst. Hope everyone enjoyed this!


End file.
